Ok so I was re-reading the post that I linked to yesterday...
"The Men in My Life"
And I wanted to review some things.
"3: Bruce*. He is the epitome of sweet. Sometimes I wonder if I have been dreaming about him or if he is real. If you have been reading you know all the really sweet things he has done since day one. But I wonder how long it will last. I am not being pessimistic just realistic. Will he stay like this forever and even if we don't work out still be friends? or Will he change in a few months and then decide he can find something else that is "better" (you can't get much better than me)? One the one hand I know where I could go with this, but on the other do I want to set my self-up for another bone-shattering fall?"
Wow... did I call that one or what... Damn I really shoulld listen to my gut insticnt more often.. I knew from the very begining that this guy wasn't what he said he was... why didn't I listen to myself.... damn
"4: Steve*. He is one of my best friends. I feel I can tell him anything, he is my male version of EZ. He has never been judgemental and has even given me some great advice. I want him to see himself like I do: an amazing person whose heart is bigger that he lets on. He has so much to offer the world but has shut himself up becuase of stupid people. I say let them be stupid you just outshine them all."
Hmmm not sure what to say about this one.... turns out he wasn't as good a friend as I thought. Again I don't know where the break down happened... the last I heard was at his birthday he wanted to "re-connect" and now here I am standing here with my thumb up my ass looking like an idiot... tell me again why I beleive guys when they say things to me....
"5: Charlie*: What more can I say about him? He is a friend, or more correctly I should say I am his friend. I do for him what I do for so many others. But he taught me something. He taught me that my heart is more fragile and precious than anything else in this world. He taught me that I need to be very careful before I going making assumptions, that I should not hold any expectations no matter what. He taught me that sometimes we say things and mean them at the time but that in a few minutes/hours/days/weeks those things have no meaning. Its becuase of him that I am afraid of letting myself go with Bruce*. Well that and the fact that I might scare Bruce away if I really did let go. I can be pretty intense. (duh poet)"
LMAO I am fucking psychic! I did let myself go with Bruce* and I did scare him off... holy shit. only thing different about is Charlie.... is well nothing... he is exactly as he was when I met him 6 months ago...
Well there ya go and there ya have it... I'm done with it... I know I said I wouldn't blog about Bruce* anymore, but shit I said the same thing about Charlie* LOL.
Now what I need to do is come up with an accurate online dating profile for myself.... any suggestions? Yeah I am going to jump back on the bandwagon... I know that love won't find you if your sitting at home doing nothing, so I am back online (on a site I pay for and that other people have to pay for so this time I know they have to be at least somewhat serious). Also I am going to get out there in the real world and do more things that I like....
Who knows maybe on one of my hiking trips I'll run into "Mr. Right-for-Me" and it will be happily-ever-after.
Ok gotta go... I'm looking for a camping group to join too.... And I may have found my new vehicle... just have to wait for a response from the guy... keep your fingers crossed...
*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.