The story is a long one so I'll shorten it to this:
They were supposed to be here Saturday night and because of crappy service and crappy weather on the east coast they did not get here till Sunday mid-morning. After we rescued their luggage and lost a coat at the car rental place. We all set off for the hotel for a late lunch, then we headed out to the Outlet Mall (one of many in Vegas) for some shopping...
(hmm need a catchy name for Mom....)
Bruce's mom needed to get a new coat. While there they decided that Bruce needed new shoes. so we headed to the sketcher's store where Bruce got 2 new pairs of tennis shoes and a new pair of work boots. I sat back and watched the hilarity of Bruce trying on a million pair of shoes while both his mom and his step dad brought a million more for him... He settled on a pair that I liked (very cool dark blue and gray) and a pair he liked (looks exactly like the blue ones only black and beige) and some black leather work boots.
Bruce is sometimes a little evil. and while his mom is within visual range but out of earshot he makes plenty of sexual innuendos. My face lights up like Rudolph's nose in heavy fog conditions. I caught her looking at us a few times and I'm certain she knows exactly what was going on.
During the process his mom offers to buy me a pair of the fuzzy slippers I had been eyeballing. I declined. I am a little uncomfortable with other people buying me stuff (especially people I have only known for a little less than 6 hours). Plus I am the kind of person that hates to impose and since she is here to see Bruce, I would have felt like a cad having her buy me shoes. Oh yeah lets also add I'm completely neurotic about what other people think of me and I NEVER want anyone to think of me as a girl who is all about the things I can get. I am not but I have been accused of it so many times that now I go out of my way (sometimes even making people mad at me) to try to make sure that people know I am not materialistic.
But somehow She ended up buying my son a pair of shoes that light up and kind of look like fire engines. He's going to love them! I may have a problem with people buying stuff for me, but I don't have a problem with people buying stuff for my son. Heck I'll even take their money and put it into his college fund. My son is numero uno.
PS. DJ spent the day with his dad so Mom and Step-dad haven't met the little guy yet.
After we get them all settled into their hotel room for the evening Bruce and I go to dinner (we are starving). And Bruce tells me that I am the first girlfriend who has declined his mom's ever generous offer to buy them something. He thinks that says something about my personality. I wish I knew what that is....
WARNING!!
There is blatant sexual innuendo in the following bit
This morning starts out ok, Bruce and I are texting back and forth...
...wait...
Let me set this up. His mom a good church going woman who thinks her son should shave two or three times a day (he has 5-o'clock shadow by noon) and made him change his jacket while they were getting the rental car because she was afraid they wouldn't rent a car to them. I think its all very cute, very 1950's mom. Sometimes it gets on His nerves (don't all mom's?).
He sends me this little gem this morning:
Bruce: "she started about the shaving... yes mom, i know mom, i will mom... haha"
Me: "LOL did you tell her I like the way it feels when your unshaven face is buried between my legs while you chow down on my taco?"
Bruce: "Ya... she said she did not need 2 know that..."
Me: "LOL... no you didn't"
Bruce: "... as she reads the text out loud as I drive.."
Me: "OMG! I'm a putz... holy smokes... you think my face was red last night... oh jeez i'm going to go bury myself in a dark cave till next year"
Bruce "U... I am now trying 2 explain taco
Me: "LOL just forget I exist..."
Bruce: "she said see sue likes when u r clean shaven"
Me: "Sure... I do... I'm so putting this in my blog"
Bruce: "at the end of blog put... Early april fools"
Me: "you are evil sometimes..."
*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.
2 comments:
Ahhh ... but you got to admit he got you.
I don't have to admit to anything!!!
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