Monday, September 29, 2008

Another one Bites the dust

They say that when one door closes another opens... I think I just had that happen to me.

Charlie* is going to see if he can work things out with his ex.

*tear drop on page*

But on the other hand, I made phone contact with a guy I have been chatting up for the last few weeks online. We'll call him Bruce*. He loves the outdoors like I do (Charlie is very anti dirt). He owns a motorcycle, I grew up crawling all over them (Charlie has never even thought of owning one). He has beautiful blue eyes (so does Charlie).

*sigh* I get the feeling that I am going to have to consciously try to not compare guys with Charlie.

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

the big confession

Uh oh.

I have come to a great and disturbing realization.

I am getting way too attached to Charlie*.

Every time he calls I get a big stupid grin on my face and my heart flutters. When I hear his voice my world seems to get a little brighter. I look at his picture (that I have on my phone) at least once a day. I have been planning ever week (for the last 4 weeks) around a possible date with him. And every time he has to cancel. then I go into a mildly depressed funk which is quickly eliminated when he calls me. I am sick.

One part of me screams "Don't give up! He's such a great guy! Give him time! Things will work out!"

The other screams "WHAT THE F*CK IS WRONG WITH YOU! Go on more dates! Look at more guys! STOP WASTING YOUR TIME!"

and yet another: "Will both of you shut up? You should just give up on the race of man all together. How many guys on how websites have you messaged and so far? And all you have had is a few conversations that end abrupty. You go to bars and flirt. You flirt with guys at charity events. You make eye contact, smile and do all the other stupid things that the dating books/websites/blogs tell you to do and what have you got to show for it? nothing nada zip. You have been on 2 dates with 2 different guys. So just stop torturing yourself and buy another cat."

Holy crap I have bigger problems. it seems that I have multiple personality disorder.

anyone want to date a lonely single mom with issues?

Nope didn't think so.

Now where did I put that add for free kittens.....

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

some real poetry

Sorry it has been a while since my last post. I am kind of stuck in a rut. its the same old shit just a different day. Still talking to Charlie* on the phone and still texting Teddy. Still emailing some random guys who don't really seem interested, just bored. I figured I would at least post some poetry here, after all they do call me Poetry Sue!

Warning signs

I need to put a sign right there
That says “Caution: fragile, handle with care”
Maybe I should hand out little notes
With everything about me put in quotes
“Likes to read and write and laugh
Puts everything in plus time and a half”
“Easily trusting and ready to listen
With soft brown hair and blue eyes that glisten”
“Sometimes talks a little too much
Likes to be treated with a tender soft touch”
“Patience is virtue number one
Completely in love with her only son”
“Totally comfortable with her weight
And still looking for that fabled soul mate”
“Tries not to judge on first sight
Knows the difference between wrong and right”
“Tough as nails and soft as satin
Knows a few words in ancient Latin”
“Keeps the peace in family affairs
Tracks the details with out splitting hairs”
“Likes to keep her eyes on the prize
Respects her elders as learned and wise”
But above all others, I should say
Is to keep one on me every day
Pin it to my shirt right there
“Caution: fragile, handle with care”

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

With a Capital "D"

ok Well not much has been happening. OH WAIT! I have good news!


ok here I'll give the quick version of the story:

I was young and in love I married a guy even younger than me.
We moved in together. After our 1 year aniversary he turned into a deuchebag. I tried everything (counseling, drugs, sex) to keep things going. He lost his job and would not get another one. we lost our house and had to move back in with my parents. He began to act like an asshole to my family. My family retailiates and acts like an asshole to him. I attempt to keep the peace.

One day Deuchebag drops me off at my employee shuttle stop (I had a 1 hour ride on the employee shuttle all the way out to stateline for work at the time) kiss me good bye and says "i'll be here to pick you up at 3pm. I get back at 3pm. time passes:
3:30pm nothing
4:00pm nothing
4:30pm I borrow quarter from bum to call someone.
5:00pm nothing and still trying to hang up fast enough to get my quarter back from pay phone
5:30pm finally get ahold of Dad to come get me
6:00pm Dad arrives
6:30pm make it home and begin calling every hospital/police station/morgue
7:00pm I find out what has happened

It seems that Deuchebag has decided to leave me and left a note for me at a friends shop. something I would not have even seen until MAYBE the next day. His note says how much he loves me and wants me too move with him and he will wait for me.. He has moved back to his ancestral home in alabama. Yes that is right My Husband (ex now) is from ALABAMA... ugh

So about 6 months after he left I started Divorce proceedings that same month I found out I was pregnant (Surprise!). My son will 3 next month. So yeah... it has been over 4 years and it just became final on Monday at 9:55 am. HOORAAAY!

This guy is such a deuchebag that he had 2, count them 2, divorce lawyers quit becuase "they were not able to work for him". Yeah that says Deuchebag with a capital "D"

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Teddy: the adorable little bear.

Teddy* is adorable

So Teddy* and I decided to meet at Caesar's Palace in the Cypress Street Marketplace (please read as high end food court) at 7pm. Woo Hoo finally I get to meet the guy I have sending text messages to for the last 2 weeks.

Well Blue* calls me and wants to know if he can come to Poetry. I am a pushover and say yes:

Me: But I have a date at 7pm so you have to entertain your self while I am busy
Blue: (evil smile) Oh I can entertain myself
Me: Jeez Just don't Scare this guy off I really like him.
Blue: Oh OK

The time line runs something like this:
4:00pm - clock out
4:01pm to 4:55pm - rush trough Vegas traffic on I-15, Sahara, and Eastern to pick my son up
4:56pm to 5:05pm - convince my son that he will be back at school tomorrow and we need to go
5:05pm to 5:10pm - run a red light to get home so I can shower (oh yeah that's right Hot water is out at my house damn it going to mom's)
5:11pm to 5:15pm - decide which ice cream to get so that "The Kid" will shut up and be occupied while I shower (thank you mister latino ice cream truck driver)
5:16pm to 5:30pm - shower (shave everything wash everything) Quickest Shower ever!
5:31pm to 5:45pm - clean up enormous ice cream mess on mom's new carpet, call Baby Daddy and tell him to get his butt over there with a change of clothes for the kid, brush my hair, get kid in the bath tub, unlock front door for baby daddy, explain that he actually has to play daddy tonight and give the kid a bath, send and reply to no less than 5 text message from 4 different people. haul ass bask to my house
5:46pm - breathe
5:47pm - panic because Blue called and wants to bring more people. OMG seriously when did I become the event coordinator
5:48pm - no more panic situation handle those b*tches can get their own ride if they need one. I only promised one to Blue.
5:49pm to 6:15pm - AAAARRRRRGGGHHH what in the heck am I going to wear. Pick an outfit put in dryer to get wrinkles out NO TIME FOR IRONING get dressed, brush teeth, take cough meds, go pee.
6:15pm to 6:38pm - once again brave Las Vegas traffic on Eastern and Sahara. pick up Blue
6:40pm - Receive Text from Teddy saying he will be a few minutes late... thank god I can stop breaking traffic laws to get there on time
6:58pm - Arrive at Caesar's Palace. Uh Oh not only am I not a few minutes late, I am EARLY. damn it Send text to Teddy and say I'm Here call me when you arrive
6:58pm to 7:38pm - wait for Teddy

Yeah that's right, not only is he late, he is almost 40 minutes late.... I see him from afar. I am guiding him by phone to my location... He is cute... gets closer.... closer..... He is standing right in front of me. I am looking down at him. That's right. My little 5'3" self in 2" heels is looking slightly down at him. damn it again. we sit down and eat and talk and.... well OK... so I do most of the talking, but it's his fault! He keeps asking me questions about me..... AND I love to talk about me and my CRAZY family.

My phone rings..... it is a private number.... damn it this could be anyone. which means I have to answer it... guess what....


Now let me digress a moment and tell you about my day with Charlie:


That's right. Not a single text not a single phone call. Nada. Zip. Zero. Zilch. Nothing. He decides that an hour into my date with Teddy to call me. Now granted Charlie did not know I was going on a date, but still... what great timing.

I tell him I'm busy and will have to call him back. There how does he like a taste of his own medicine (ahhh that is fodder for another blog).

Back to Teddy:

At the beginning of the date Teddy tells me he can't stay long because he has a few projects he needs to work on (making money) and he has Jury duty in the morning. He has to leave a little after 8. Jeez I'm thinking, thanks for the half hour buddy. But it turns out that we enjoyed each other's company so much he stayed till like 9:30 and I had to practically run to get to Poetry.

So there it is.

Teddy is a short latino computer geek. Oh and I failed to mention earlier that he has a slightly lazy eye. But he has a great personality and is easy on the eyes(no pun intended) and neck since I don't have to look up.

Now what.

Charlie: Tall, Sexy, have I ever told you that he is disgustingly rich, LOTS of Drama
Teddy: Short, Adorable, Lazy Eye, Great personality, NO Drama

ugh now what do I do?

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

The Places I go and the People I see

Here it is MY LIST:

The First:

Chances are you either have a profile here or you know someone who does. I would like to say that I have not been very lucky here, but actually I have been very lucky here. I have made contact with 2 very different guys

Charlie* - Good looking guy. 33. very tall. good job. single dad. Has alot of baby mama drama and ex-wife drama (not the same drama either poor dude). only been on one date but he paid and we talk every day on the phone

Teddy* - from his pics online he's good looking. 28. Starting his own business but also works full time to pay the bills. No kids, never married. but works 6 days a week. I haven't met him in person yet. But I am going to tonight (thursday 9-18-08) so keep your fingers crossed that those pics weren't like 10 years old and now he's an 800 lb gorrilla.

Other Observations about plentyoffish:
I have messaged no less than 30 guys on this damn site. less than half respond and only one (Charlie*) actually started a dialogue with me. ONLY ONE guy has ever messaged me first, that was Teddy. and he thinks i'm sexy in my pics. (ok maybe he is blind, I can handle that) so over all I think of this site as a failure, but won't be giving up entirely on it. after all not only did I meet these two guys I also met a guy from AZ, we'll call him "The Zesty Zebra"*, who is pretty good at that internet sex stuff.... perfect those lonely nights. (which is every night for me)

The Second:

Ok I have not actually met anyone from here But I have started a dialogue with a guy. if it goes anywhere I'll keep you posted. but so far its just getting to know you talk. He's a few years younger than me so I am leary (I swore after my sons father I wouldn't date younger guys anymore).

Other Observations about hotornot:
This is actually a site where people rate your picture. Be prepared for brutal honesty. I am only a 5 (which is exactly where I thought I would be). My sister convinced me to join this site and she warned me that it was brutal... My sister is a total hottie and she only ranks an 8.8.

The Third:

I did a google search for free online dating. BE CAREFUL not all of those sites are actually free. But this one is. I have started a dialogue with a guy. ok... fine... we have sent 3 emails to each other. And an online dialogue with a guy who is of the Dark Chocolate Variety. I like my men like I like my ice cream, creamy, white, and melting in my mouth (tee hee hee) so Mister D.C. (Dark Chocolate) probably isn't going to get past the online stage.

Other Observations about
This site has a great feature that allows you to browse profiles and if you are interested in one, but are like me and tired of sending messages to people who could care less, you can mark them off as someone you are interested in. Then on the sly the website will put your profile in as one of the next few that person views then if they also mark you as someone they are interested in, the site lets you know! very cool! So far I have had 3 mutual interest thingies. only 2 have responded so far ond only one has started a dialogue.

The Fourth:

This is an interesting site. it is mostly based around a sh*tload of questionaires and tests you can take whenever you feel like it. Then based on your answers the site gives you a percentage of your compatibility to the people in your search criteria. I have yet to make good contact with anyone on this site yet.. it seems that most of these wierdos are on the site for the tests. if you are amused by peronlaity tests I suggest you check it out. if you are looking for a date (not a booty call) then I suggest you look at one of the other sites mentioned here.

In Conclusion:
I am completely disappointed in online dating. I figured this would be the perfect way for a busy single mom to meet guys. so far... not so much. But perhaps things will get better. Just to let you know I have signed up for a few of the speed dating things (where you meet 8-15 guys in a few hours). If I go to one, be sure that I will blog about it.

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Bare with me

Just to let you all know: My spelling is horrible and my typing is worse. I blog mostly from work (don't tell my boss) (oh wait he subscribes to my blog... never mind) so if there is a word missing or you think there should be better grammer... stuff it. You get what you see and I ain't perfect!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Mondays suck

So monday has come and gone. and I never got to see the magic show. I got really sick this weekend. so sick that my boss sent me home early from work on monday.

There are some devolpments in my "Charlie" thing. I started get a little nervous with all the serious talk. so I asked him to put us on the same page. of course I am not very smooth about it and if it had been anyone else they would have had no clue it went some thing like this:

Me: I have a question for you
Charlie: sure
Me: Well some of things you have said recently.... well... i just..... you see.... I wanted to know.... I just want to make sure we are the same page.... and well... I just... You see... (some incoherent babling)
Charlie: you want to know How I feel about you and where we stand.
Me: yeah
Charlie: well... I like you alot, your honest and straight-forward and that is so refreshing......(long pause) well you know i'm not ready to be serious yet and I want to date some people and see if I can't figure out what I really want.... I'm kind of seeing this other girl -(my hearing shuts down)

He goes on to tell me how he's know her for a long time and they are friends blah blah blah. and suddenly I have an epiphany. All the time he has been staying out late "gambling" has proably just been a ruse to keep me from being hurt that he is dating other people.

Why is this a problem, you ask. well I think that subconciously he gets that I really like him. and he doesn't want to hurt me. which is cool, but the fact that he hides it hurts me more. strange I know. I am after all a little bit jealous. he makes time for other women, but not for me. Yet he tells me that we will go out again. So now I'm all confused.

Then he hits me with the other big news. His ex-wife wants him to take her back, and he is considering it.

hold on I need a moment......

Ok I can handle this. I think.

This Great Guy wants to take back the psycho nut job that broke his heart. Yeah ok. he needs more work. So for now I am just going to continue the phone convos and hopefully he'll actually want to see me again, not just read me some lip service....

Here is a teaser for the next blog:
The many sites I am on and how they fare.

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

"Only the Lonely"

So Charlie* and I were going to try to make plans to get together early next week but, then disaster strikes! He has to work on his days off. And that is the entire reason why I will never work for a casino! unless I work in the corporate offices. So now I have 2 tickets to go see a magic show. and no one to go with. :( I think I might try to see if Teddy* will want to meet me in person and if so maybe we can get together on monday and he can use Charlie's ticket.


I really like Charlie and he keeps making these little comments that makes me think that he really likes me too.

In an earlier post I talked about the comment he made about WHEN I meet his son.

Remeber we are being leary of introducing our kids to people until we are sure it will be serious. Then he goes and says "When you meet my son..."

Next Comment:

on Sunday night we were talking about being crazy. Yes everyone is crazy in their own way and it usually stems from childhood things. We both acknowledge that there are things in our past that should have killed weeker people but we made it through. We have yet to discuss these things. while on the phone (becuase we NEVE SEE EACH OTHER) He says:

"When we reach that point in our relationship I'll tell you all about it..."

wha... did he just say RELATIONSHIP

so I throw back (trying to trip him up)

"Well, When we reach that point in our ... relationship ... we'll have a hash session and I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours"

Conversation continues...


he is throwing words around like "relationship" and not even batting the proverbial eye.

But wait! Theres More!

Skip forward to Monday night, we are again talking on the phone (grumble) and we are talking about where we see our selves going in life and reincarnation and the reason for having children. He is talking about how he knows there is alot more for him in this world, important stuff for him to do, he just doesn't know what yet (don't start laughing, sometimes I get the same feelings). and he says:

"For instance, There is this thing with You and me, I'm not sure what, but I'm going with it, I think it might be important"

From any other guy I would be creeped out, but you see Charlie and I talk alot (duh) and we know each other probably better than our exes ever knew us. I know he is not being creepy, he is actually voicing how he feels about what is going on between us. Which is braver than I have been.

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

Friday, September 5, 2008

The Uncontrolable Blue Wave

Thursday night (09-04-08) was "Poetry Night". This guy Blue* called me up and wanted to know if I could pick him up on my way to Poetry and bring him back home. (yeah I know) I said yes (stopping yelling at me). Blue* is a nice guy, if a little on the unpredictable side. Now hold on for a wild ride:

We get to Caesar's Palace and park in the parking garage. Which is always fun when I am driving my dad's truck (my car is on the fritz). My dad's tuck sits about 3-4 inches taller than it normally would because its got big redneck tires on it (yeah rednecks). So, from inside the cab it appears that the top of the truck is coming perilously close to the ceiling struts of the garage. Blue keeps ducking his head. When we finally get to the top (always park on the top) we get a good spot and the elevator doesn't take 6 years to get there. so far so good.

At this point nothing truly outrageous has happened or been said (I am not counting the indecent proposal that happened in the truck because after discussing this with Charlie* he said that there isn't a man alive who could have resisted relieving my "itch" after finding out how long it has been since I was "scratched"). Then a very nice looking (if scantily dressed) young woman enters the elevator. Poor girl. Blue immediately introduces him self and starts asking her where she is from (here) where she is going (work) Where does she work (Ghost Bar) What does she do (dance) Does she want to marry him (nervous chuckle). By the time we get to the third floor (only 2 floors down) this girls is so ready to get away from Blue that she actually begins to step out of the elevator at the 3rd floor . I repeat... Poor Girl. Now not only is she stuck on the elevator with Blue but so is everyone else who is getting nervous just listening to Blue. Now mind you he isn't saying anything lewd or nasty. If it had been Brad Pitt saying these things no one would have minded.

By now I am sure you are asking "weren't you embarrassed?"

Who me?

I am the girl who in high school went with her friends to the mall to play "scare the straights" (not referring to sexual preference). This means we did anything we could short of actually touching someone to make them nervous. One time this guy Fido* actually sniffed this lady's butt. well she was wearing a fur coat...

When we get to the casino floor this poor girl is practically running to get away from Blue and his seeming craziness (so far this is fun!).

Since there is no smoking in dad's truck and no smoking in the elevator, I had a cigarette lit about 3.5 milliseconds after we step out of the elevator. We decided that we are hungry and to get something at the Cypress Street Food Court. Which is conveniently locate next to the elevators (fat girls beware). After much soul searching (and number crunching because Blue is poor and I am footing the bill on this one) I decided we are getting Salads from the Romaine Salad place. Now let me explain the awesomeness of this place:

You start with either a romaine hearts lettuce cluster or a mixed greens cluster. Nice. I go with mixed and Blue gets the Plain Jane hearts. Next you get to pick any thing you want from this bar of stuff and get it added to your salad. oh did I forget to mention that you can get as much as you want? Once you have made your selection of extras they will toss it with your choice of dressing and give it back to you in a nice little take home box. I wondered at this until I hefted my super salad. Ahh I get it no one can eat the whole thing. OK well maybe that Super Fat chick you always see on the Discovery Health show. but then I doubt she's eating any salads.

So here is my salad:
Mixed greens with peppercinis, artichoke hearts, olives, chicken, turkey, and a little bit of each of the cheeses (there's like 8 cheeses, I love cheese). Tossed with a balsamic herb vinaigrette. Nice very yummy and lots of stuff. it took me 2 days to eat the whole thing.

Here is what Blue got:
Romaine heart greens with every thing from the top row, everything from the second row (except olives) and everything from the bottom row tossed with ranch dressing. Yeah and that is not an exaggeration.

OK now that you have caught your breath. Last time I heard he was still munching on this monster.

For him this is perfect. because "every bite is a different experience" as he puts it. We sit down directly across from the salad place. there is no way we can lug these heavy hitters to any other point in the food court, better safe than sorry I say, I already have a bad back. we start on our salads and he explains every bite he is taking, then he bites into the strangely shaped dried fruit.

"mm that's sweet... oh wait *yuerch* that is bitter. What the heck was that?"

He holds up the piece he just bit off and asks the chef who tossed our salads (who has been staring at the spectacle that is Blue):

"Hey man, what is this thing"

the chef picks up a plastic container from the first row and points at it. Then he grins sheepishly and shrugs his shoulders. he turns to the register girl (who has also been staring at Blue) asks her. She has no clue either. AWESOME

Not only does the Chef not know what it is, the girl at the register doesn't know either. Blue talks the chef into trying a piece. I watch this poor unsuspecting guys face and see the exact moment when the flavor changes. Interesting how a persons face can twist when confronted with unexpected bitterness in the mouth. He spits out what ever was in his mouth (don't worry, it he was very sanitary about the whole thing) He then runs to the back and disappears for a few minutes.. he comes out looking a little sweaty and pale and tells us that it is dried, candied ginger.


Well the rest of the night is pretty much along the same lines. Blue randomly hitting up any girl who catches his eye, and doing anything to get a reaction out of people. It is a lot of fun to watch people get uncomfortable and then realize that there is no danger and then for them to seem bereft when Blue's attention is drawn else where. He is a magnet. once anyone gets past to original shock factor they are swpet into his personality and carried away on his Uncontrollable Blue Wave.

So that was my adventure with Blue. He is a nice guy, but not really what I am looking for. So I think it will only remain friends. He is fun to take around uptight people....

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

Thursday, September 4, 2008


So Charlie* and I have been talking for well over 2 weeks now. One date, 3,ooo** minutes and 300** text messages later we are talking about date number 2. I don't think it will happen soon. his friend is in town for another week. The good part though is that he confirmed he would like to go on a 2nd date. which is cool.

no wait let me rephrase that:


can you tell I really like this guy?

on another note

There have been 2 other guys to recently show interest:

Blue* is a nice guy. kind of goofy looking in a cute way. and introduced to me by one of the few people on this planet I can not spend more than ten minutes with at any given time. Blue* is cool and even helped me out once with a guy who was making unwanted sexual overtures. But... yeah there is a but. He is not very mature. It seems to me that he takes his work a little to seriously (he's a voice actor for a local theme park. he does very popular animated yellow square dudes). He seems like he would be a romantic but that he wouldn't know when to get his head out of the clouds. *sigh* He is coming this week to Poetry.

Teddy* I have never talked to on the phone. We have strictly been chatting online. but he seems like a nice guy. I invited him to my poetry thing but he is busy this week. maybe next week.

Now I will answer all the questions that have been coming to me:

"When are you and Charlie* going to move in together"
>Really? do you think that is going to happen?

"When are you and Charlie* going to 'do the deed'?"
>Jeez I would like it to be... well... tonight but it might be more like 3 months (ugh if I have waited this long another 3 months won't kill me)

"I thought you were going to try dating lots of guys."
>well Thats kind of hard to do when there aren't any guys interested in an AAG. Please read above for the 2 "others" on my dance card

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Charlie and the chocolate girls Part2

OK so where were we?

Ah yes we were at thursday night

Friday Morning - Sunday
We have been exchanging text messages and phone calls all weekend and Charlie* had a friend fly in from Canada on sunday. I expected the calls and text messages to lessen becuase he can't very well ignore his friend, whom he hasn't seen in about 6 years, to talk to some bimbo (thats me) that he has only known for a few days.

I did not expect him to keep up with the 2-4 hour converstations.

Give one guess as to if he did or not.....


How cool! Well we talked and talked and talked

by now you are asking "What in the heck can 2 people have to talk about for that long on any given day let alone every day of the week?" well I can't really say for 2 reasons:

1. We talk about private personal stuff. the stuff you share with someone you are interested in. and even the stuff you don't tell someone until you are serious about them (that is mostly him I'm not quite ready to go down that road). Stuff I am not going to repeat for the internet audience

2. We talk about everyday crap. what we did, what we had to eat, what we watched on tv, what my cats did, what our kids did. We are basically Keep each other updated everyday. Very cool.

This is actually more converstaion than I had with either of my last 2 relationships (ex-husband and baby daddy) combined. I like it. I have always been a talker and a listener. and so is he. THIS IS AWESOME!

Well Monday we don't really get to talk during the day but we sit and talk in the evening. And I make fun of him for being a white guy listening to hip hop (nothing wrong with that its just funny) and he says "Well I have to get in touch with the younger crowd, with my target market" I laughingly say "well what is your target market" and he starts stuttering and not being able to put 2 words together.

Uh Oh.

this can be either good or bad. I'm going for bad.

I say "Come on you can tell me. What, do you think you are going to hurt my feelings?"

a moment of silence from him. uh oh

"Well no its just that I am attracted to a certain type of woman..... you know kind of exotic looking, mocha skinned.... blah blah blah"

I kind of zoned out the reast because I have heard it before from a thousand other guys. Now, If you have been to my myspace and seen my pics you would know that I am as far from exotic and mocha skinned as you can get. *sigh*

Yet another guy who wants the All American Girl (AAG) but looks for the Exotic Looking Girl (ELG). I am as AAG as you get. there is not one ounce of ELG in me. I'm so Irish my blood is green whiskey. I'm so American mMy heart is Red White and Blue. Yeesh.

So now I tune back in time to hear him say, "...but I have dated all kinds of girls, and I just find my self really attracted to ...blah blah blah"


So now I am thinking that this is going to go nowhere fast, He got one look at me and now he is trying to tell me nicely that he isn't attracted to me. ugh

But I let it slide and we move on to the more mundane portions of our converstaion, like politics and religion. (yeah we can discuss our different view points civilly. Its great.)

Tuesday Morning:
I send what has become my standard good morning text message. and I get nothing back. and nothing. and nothing and nothing.... by 2:00pm I have worked myself into this great melancholic mood about how he has decided (or his friend has convinced him) that i'm not worth the effort or he really doesn't want to even pursue a casual thing or something. Ahh and how creative I become when in this mood. I wrot a whole new poem and a nice narative. awesome.

But then. Low and behold. as soon as I am getting ready to leave work. he calls.

HE CALLS! I did a little happy dance.

And we talk for a little bit. turns out he had some serious woman drama (I am ssuming ex-wife since baby momma hasn't been heard from in weeks) that he had to take care of and it was not very pleasant. but how nice it was to talk to me. *fluttery eyelash sigh* And can he call me llater after he gets off work.

well duh of course

I am sitting in the hot tub relaxing after a long day of working my self up and cleaning out my extra room. and I get sturck by another piece of literary perfection, something I had to share with him. So I sent a text:

"allow me wax quixotic. Here I sit in the swirling warm waters wishing I wasn't alone"

immediately he calls me. and we talk again for another hour and a half about poetic attitudes and literary achievements. but after I get home we cut off and both fall asleep before we can call each other back... LOL

So here we are up to current on today.

Now here is the deal with us (me and Charlie*)

We both agree to take things very slowly (both recently screwed by those we thought loved us)
We both agree that we weren't looking for anything long term
We both are operating under the agreement that sex will not be happening for a while
We both agree that we aren't going to just willy nilly introduce our kids to the people we are "dating" (i.e. each other) until things are serious

Last night, while in the hot tub, he says:

"When you meet my son..."

did you catch that?

"WHEN you meet my son..."

Now what do you think that means?

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Charlie and the chocolate girls Part1

So a few weeks ago I started a profile on At first I was getting nothing. No hits on my page, no messages in my box. and no responses to my messages to other people. It sucked I felt like the big dopey kid at the dance that no one wants to talk to so they avoid looking at him all together.

POF (plenty of fish) has a forum where you can request someone to review your profile and hellp you make changes to make you more apealling to other users. I did this and ended up using most of the suggestions given to me by everyone (thanks guys). Immediately I got more responses. but still no one sending.

Then I happened accross this profile of this guy... Lets call him Charlie*. He talked about how his family is important and he can respect someone who is family oriented. He talked about how he is a nice guy with alot to offer and he is just looking for someone to hang out with right now and how he is tired of drama.... well I was impressed. And he was cute in his picture. To be honest he wasn't really a guy I would normally look for, but my "normal" hasn't got me anything but a broken heart and single motherhood. so I sent him a little note to say how impressed I was about how up front he is about how important his family is.

He responded.

let me give you a moment to absorb that.....


he said how he thinks people with the same ideas about family have a certain kinship and mabe we should talk some time. HE GAVE ME HIS PHONE NUMBER!

another moment for absorbing...

Now, I responded with how much I would love to talk to him and gave him my number.

He called me the next day....


and we talked for 2 hours

and the next day for 3 hours

and the next day for 4 hours

we pretty much leveled out at 4 hours a day.

in between phone calls we sent each other text messages. all day we were in contact.

in the course of our conversations we both acknowledged that we weren't looking for anything long term but if it happened, it happened. And we shared some deep dark secrets. When I asked him why he wanted to share this info with me.. he said:

"I'm not sure, I think its because I genuinely like you. Yeah I don't know why, but I like you."

Now remember... we have not met in person at this point yet, but we both have pictures up on POF and have viewed each other's profile. And my pictures are all recently taken pics showing off me at candid moments with full body shots and up close face shots.

I did this because I wanted these guys to see the real me. (what an idiot)

Well after more than a week of phone correspondencem our schedules finally meshed and we had a couple of hours where we could get together. We decided on doing something he hadn't done before, and something I enjoyed doing when I had the time. We went to a hookah lounge.

I felt like a teen girl out on her first date (well this was my first date in over 6 years) I was nervous and excited. I got there early.

I called him on the phone and talked to him while he was on his way there. And when he got there.....

ah WOW I was totally dumbstruck...

he was WAY cuter in person. Freaking hot!

the place was great, it had cozy seating (I didn't say comfy, I said cozy) and quiet jaz playing. And we talked and talked and talked. and we smoked hookah :-) his first time with tobacco in the hookah ;-) we laughed at each others jokes, we shared pics of our kids, we shared some hummus (yummy).

we had a great time!

at the end of the evening we parted in the parking lot. He hugged me once we talked a little more and he hugged me again a little harder. and I swear I got the "I would love to kiss you vibe" but we didn't kiss. (remember taking things slowly). we left the parking lot driving in opposite directions and no less than 5 minutes later he calls me! And tells me what a great time he had, he really enjoyed himself and would I call him when I got done with my poetry thing.

My poetry thing ran late but I sent him a text and he was cool with it.

Here is where I will leave the story for now. Tomorrow I will tell you the rest.

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**holes and the clueless.

In the Begining

In the begining there was a lonely single mom who was new to todays dating scene, then came Then she met a guy from this site, and she liked him, and then there was nothing... yup nothing.

Well thats how things go for me. Stay tuned and you will get the low down on my dating life, its antics and maybe you will feel so sorry for me you'll send me a pity date. *sigh*

My next blog will be about "Charlie"* who was my first date after deciding it was time enough to get out there and try dating... again....

*names have been changed to protect the innocent, the a**hole, and the clueless